Tuesday, March 26, 2019

Crochet Lace Hankies


Crochet Lace Hankies
Surfing internet for hours and hours
to kill my nocturnal ennui
I stumbled upon those long forgotten
Crochet laced hankies .
Sewn with dainty silken laces,
like the ones my mother made
in lilac, aquamarine and tangerine shades.
She decorated my kerchiefs
With dulcet patterns looped with care
and fixed them to my check pinafore
as she dropped me at the day care.
And she also made hordes of them
to pack them in my trousseau trunk.
As nostalgia washed me over again,
I ordered a dozen online
For my mother with her dwindling eyesight.

- Neha Bansal





Sunday, February 17, 2019

The Barren Woman


The Barren Woman
They called her “baanjh
The barren earth
Who couldn’t bloom a little flower.
A beloved grandson
Who would help them
Cross “Vaitarni” after death.
Putting her eggs under scanner,
While the test for their virile son proscribed.
They dragged her to the Guru’s cave
for the grant of their heart’s desire.
With greasy dirty hands,
He felt her all over
And said that he would cleanse her
of her previous birth’s sins.
As the evening chants grew louder
and the twilight deepened,
the Guru repeatedly raped her
and her cries drowned in the din.
At dawn, shutters were opened
And the acolytes dressed her up.
With “blessings” planted,
She was handed over at once.
Now cleansed by Guru
She should hopefully conceive
And put an end to the shame
of being a barren womb.

- Neha Bansal

Urmila


Urmila



While feminists sing Sita’s blues
Decrying Rama’s spineless back,
The traditionalists try to justify
Keeping Rama in his times and context.
The little sister of Janaki
is never talked about.
The languishing wife of Laxmana
who for fourteen years was left behind.
Honouring his fraternal ties,
when he followed Rama,
the world extolled his supreme devotion
and relinquishing the princely charms.
But no one cares for his lonely wife
who embraced sleep at his command.
For fourteen years, Urmila slept
And dreamt dutifully his share of dreams
While he stood wide awake
To guard outside Rama’s hermitage.
Her tender dreams of honeyed love
Turned sour by his departure
Even the sweet embrace of sleep
Couldn’t provide any succour.
The long unloved fourteen years
brought fine wrinkles and grey hair.
Urmila sleeps on her palatial bed,
her nuptial dreams sacrificed at duty’s altar.
                                                    - Neha Bansal

Flaming June (1895) by Lord Leighton





Saturday, February 9, 2019

Love song of Hidimbi, the forest-dwelling wife of Bhima


Love song  of Hidimbi, the forest-dwelling wife of Bhima

I saw him by the Parijat tree
fragrant and wild eyed,
As he walked to and fro
by the sleeping shades of five.
Asked to lure the humans,
the delectable meat.
my cannibal brother,
relished with great appetite.
But one look at him
on the Asvin poornima night,
I was heady with love
in the bower of milky light.
Forgetting my sororal bonds,
the stranger I approached.
My gait coy, eyes downcast
this feeling hitherto, totally unknown.
Gazing at my swarthy face,
his dark eyes gleamed.
he eyed me head to toe
appreciatively, or so, it seemed.
True to my tribal blood,
I couldn’t hold myself back.
And, declared by unabashed love,
to the amusement of brothers now awake.
He blushed like a girl,
this mighty son of God
and went to stand by his mother,
who to her son’s rescue, came to the fore.
With a regal bearing, this fair woman
asked me my name.
To what lineage I belonged?
And, what was my claim to fame.
I was irritated by her scrutiny,
her gaze mocking my Non-Aryan blood.
I could see her cold condescending eyes
But his gentle smile warmed me up.
“ I am the princess of this vana,
Hidimbi my name.
Sister to the mighty king Hidimb,
whose bravery will put most men to shame.
We ride tigers, tame elephants
And hunt humans for meat.
But, will forgo my cannibalistic ways
O, mother! If your customs so insist.”
Before Kunti could open her mouth,
I saw Bheema quickly move.
He fought with my mighty sibling,
my loyalties torn asunder.
Betraying my flesh and blood,
I prayed for the man I had just met.
And, as my brother laid dying
A single tear was shed.
“Was this the brother thou boasted about
Who had sent thee?
Look, I have killed him with my bare hands.”
How Bheema taunted me.
But, Kunti intervened this time
The most unexpected ally,
She chided her beloved son
and hugged me tightly.
“O daughter, thanks for warning us,
Thou may return to thy tribe.
My son, here will escort thee back,
to thine home’s safety”.
I looked at him entreatingly
as he walked with me.
Silent now but with a tender gaze,
his face changed totally.
No more the fierceness of battle,
no more that sardonic gleam,
He clasped my hand in his large ones,
and confessed his love for me.
By the river, in the grotto
we bowed our heads in my family shrine.
Outside, in dawn’s honeyed light,
He vowed to be forever mine.
My modest hut with Asoka scarlet flowers,
gave us the conjugal bliss.
We heard the cooing of doves,
my fragrant body entwined with his.
My beloved told me of their travails,
about their Lakshagraha flight,
running from their scheming kin,
denied their legitimate right.
Kunti came searching for him
with her other mighty sons.
Arjuna with his Gandiva ready
to rescue his dada from the cannibals.
We welcomed them with folded hands,
my lord and I.
As the queen of this verdant forest,
gave asylum to the mother of five.
Thus, the kshatriyas settled with us,
with royal sophistications at bay.
But, atleast they were safe here,
my mother-in-law mulled each day.
A year of unadulterated joy was this,
the foresters loved their guests
and then little Ghatotkacha arrived
to everyone’s sheer delight.
He had big almond eyes,
on the full moon face.
The stoic grandma also beamed,
singing lullaby with great tenderness.
Wearing, the tribal feathers,
the ten month old  moon-faced baby
was fed with the first morsel,
as per the tradition of his dad’s family.
Why, then Bheema looked so sad
As he came to me that night,
His favourite Mahua untouched
he just held me tight.
The following day, they were to leave,
the mother and the brothers five.
And clearly the tribal mother-son duo
didn’t belong to Hastinapur’s high life.
I wasn’t the kshatriya queen
who would be so admired.
My dusky looks and curly mops
would jeopardize all that was desired.
The five were a unit,
like a closed fist.
And, like a self effacing wife,
I must not resist.
Wails of Ghatotkacha, my silent sobs
and the wetness of Bheema’s red eyes.
None could move the steely determination,
and minute by minute all hope dies.
And, then they left us,
on the cold amavasya night.
As my husband gave us one last glance
in the earthen lamp’s flickering light.
                                             - Neha Bansal










(Painting by: Neha Bansal and Dhruw Singh)



















Tuesday, February 5, 2019

Hiraeth : mint chutney made by my mother


Hiraeth : mint chutney made by my mother
Mornings are no longer
those languorous times,
when the sweet dreams of the night
gave way to trays of breakfast in bed.
Aalu Parantha and white butter
with mint chutney so heartily prepared
on “Sil batta” my mother received in dowry.
Juliennes of ginger, minced garlic
bunches of mint with a hint of chilly
crushed together under the ancient stone
with just enough pressure,
a skill perfected over years.
So different from the one I make-
the homogenous paste
prepared in haste
in the mixer grinder
to spread on a hurried toast
gulped down with an insipid green tea.
                                            - Neha Bansal



Monday, February 4, 2019

Bangles


Bangles 



Turquoise green, they come in the box,
made of Lac and studded with pearls.
Oh! Look at those purple glass ones,
so proud of their beady swirls.
These in their silvery metal sheen,
compete, for attention, with their sequined sisters.
The royal elephants on pink enamelled beds
bring out collective gasps of desire.
As the choodiwala displays his ware,
women in our street, line up for the treat.
Vermillion red or golden hued,
their jingling sound so sweet.
While, Mothers and daughters, sisters and wives
exult with their treasure in pure delight,
We, the shaven headed widows,
with unadorned wrists, cry
silently at our plight.
                               - Neha Bansal








Sunday, February 3, 2019

Ahalya


Ahalya
 Why does her husband feel different, tonight
with passions galore?
The stony gaze has given way
to the roving admiration.
The embrace is warm and comforting
as sitting by a bonfire.
The silken eager touch so different
from the ennui of a bored lover.
The sweet nothings he whispers tonight
are nothing like the hitherto silent rituals.
Who, then stands at the door, with ashen face,
When he loves her so??
The fury of the Rishi knew no bounds
as he eyed both.
While the defiled wife cringed with horror,
Her beguiler tried to flee.
Covering her nakedness,
Ahalya stammered to explain.
Silenced as she turned to stone
and cursed to remain so.
Summers baked, winters froze
And rains washed her rigid self
as she stood rooted
to the very same spot.
Who did her greater harm
Her stony self wondered.
Was it the shape shifter
Who gave her the night of bliss
Or her lord of many wedded years
Whose rage made her Still.
                                        - Neha Bansal

(The poem is a voice of Ahalya, the beautiful wife cursed to be a stone, by her "saint-husband", Gautama Rishi as he found in her bed with Indra, disguised as Rishi himself. While lord Indra was punished in a very humiliating manner, Ahalya was given no chances to explain. She was just shut up!! muted!! Her original form could only be revived by the touch of Lotus feet of Lord Rama. )